Sunday, October 9, 2011

Tripping Over the Trois Mousquetaires

...and just when I thought life doesn't get any better than this, I trip over a blind man. Yes, seriously. I can't believe it's true, but I actually tripped over a blind man.

In amazement I still wonder, Who trips over blind people!?

Fashion Week in Paris is partly to blame, followed by the French advertisement systems. My fateful "trip" begins as Fashion Week just ended. I was inspired by seeing the tall, graceful models walking down the street, shopping, or just sitting at the cafes. They all seemed to wear high heels which made them appear even more graceful and elegant. This is where I blame them for the inspiration to wear 5 inch (13mm) heels to a lunch date I had on the Champs Elysees.

Exhibit A - 5 Inch Heels to appear "Graceful and Elegant"

As I hurried through the metro in my Fashion Week inspired heels,  I will now blame the French advertising system, as the almost 3D looking poster of The Three Muskateers caught my eye with Mathew MacFadden's sword looking like it was actually coming  out of the photo.  
Exhibit B - An Attractive Poster

But it was the second photo of "Milady" that held my attention as I wondered who the woman was in the Three Musketeers. (why couldn't the French just post one poster?!)

Exhibit C - Who is the woman in the poster?
Looking back at the photos, it seemed like both characters watched me as I thought, "hmm, I didn't know there was a woman in the Trois  Mousq........" next, everything seemed to move in slow motion as I looked forward; I saw in the bottom peripheral of my eye a thin white stick just about to touch across my left ankle, as my right foot was coming forward. At the exact moment I realized it was a blind mans stick at my feet, I attempted to jump; but somehow trying to jump over a blind mans cane in 5 inch heels when one foot is already in the air makes things worst. Just before the jump, my ankle decided to twist to the right, while my body was in the middle of the attempted jump. Still in slow motion, I could either fall on the ground to the right or grab the closest object (which was the blind man) to break the fall.

I chose the blind man, as my arms flailed across his head and shoulders, I grabbed his arm to prevent my fall. No longer in slow motion, I frantically dusted him off as if he were the one who fell, I apologized in English and French simultaneously. In a flash I was hot and angry (I thought I was the tripped victim), but everyone was looking at me, like it was all my fault. I walked quickly around a corner; humiliated. As the man silently continued on his way,  I realized that it really was all my fault. I suppose even if he had a seeing eye dog, I would have probably tripped over the dog too. ($#%& Three Musketeers poster!)

When I shared the humiliating story during lunch, I expected a little sympathy from an understanding friend, but instead I watched as she nearly fell off her chair laughing.  

I won't dare ask if life gets better than this, but I sure hope so.
Am the only one in the world to create such an awkward moment?


  1. Okay. I admit it: I burst out laughing reading this. No, you are not the only one in the world creating awkward moments. I cringe when I think of some of the awkward situations I've been part of and/or caused. And sometimes laugh. Life does get better. Until it doesn't. Until it does again. All things must pass, as the wise man sang.

  2. Oh Thank God, someone can relate! Thanks Cali for your comment and positive outlook.
    Honestly, I don't think I can possibly manage to do anything "stupider" while I'm here.