Sunday, May 10, 2009

Maybe I Should Write a Book

Here’s part of an email I wrote to my Best Friend B. After reading it, he suggested, as he has so many times, that maybe I should write a book…Maybe I will…
Hey B -
I am still stressing about making the "Change". I cannot write exactly about it, since I am at work using the computer. I have to tell this job about my decision soon, because I might have to stay for 2 weeks AFTER I tell them (I’m going to resign)...this is normal, but more and more I realize that I should not be so afraid, because I am the kind of person that will survive...okay, sometimes I need help to survive but so far, all the BIG problems are solved. This weekend I plan to book my flight. I have decided on 15 Jun. After talking to my friend (New York), she helped me realize that there is nothing really standing in the way of me and my DREAM, except for the imaginary obstacles I am putting there (The Rock Called Fear). I told her I wanted to wait for the job in Germany and then in 3 years, I would move from Germany to Paris. She helped me see that I have already waited more than 20 years in the military for my dream and now I am saying I want to wait 3 more years! When the "reality" is my DREAM is already waiting for me, I just need to use some courage to reach out for it, even though I do not really know how I will make it in Paris. Adrian still has a job for me and the job involves REAL ESTATE (she’s been telling me to hurry up and return)...B, you already know my passion for Real Estate and you also know my other passion is Paris! They are BOTH sitting there just waiting for me to find the courage to take the chance....of course I still have the other passion for a great man/boyfriend/husband/partner in my life...but maybe that will happen after I take the first step of really moving....and this time not just a temporary move like last year. Last year in Paris was like a "trial period" I think it's time for me to now make the permanent commitment. I know you agree....right? This commitment to moving and changing my life and taking a chance is kinda like my decision to get married. I've avoided it, because it takes courage, trust, and a leap of faith. Maybe moving to Paris will help with this part of my life too? Who knows? We'll see...

Yes, we’ll see…maybe I will start a book like B has suggested….

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